EVERY NIGERIAN POLITICIAN IS A “DOCTOR”

Want to run for a political office in Nigeria?
Have a glorified high school award you a Ph.D.
No prerequisite or formal education necessary.
High school dropouts are doctors.
Cow herders turned politicians are doctors.
Motor park touts turned politicians are doctors.
Illiterate Nigerian politicians are doctors.
Almajiri educated politicians are doctors.
Market women turned politicians are doctors.
Every Nigerian politician is a “doctor.”

How can someone who signs documents,
With a thumbprint, instead of a signature,
Suddenly become a doctor of letters,
Arts, literature, law, business, politics, or
Any known discipline of study?
Welcome to Nigeria, the land of absurdity,
Where politicians have no goals, except
Graft, greed, and boosting of personal egos.
They sell their souls to the highest bidder.
Money can buy anything, including education.

Donate a few thousand dollars to,
Any glorified high school, masquerading
As a degree awarding institution,
And you become an instant doctor.
Maybe their award certificates should be
Doctored, to read doctor of fraud,
Doctor of corruption, and doctor of
Vainglorious and incurable insanity.
Where everyone is a “doctor,”
No one is a doctor. Any questions?