TIME FOR DEER INSURANCE

Cruising at the posted speed limit
On a country road in the
Upper Lower Peninsula of Michigan
In broad daylight with good visibility

Suddenly a lonely deer crosses
The road from left to right
About one hundred yards away
And I breathed a sigh of relief

I slowed down thinking that
More deer shall follow as in a herd
No, no more deer follow but
I still reduced my speed of travel

The wicked greyish-brown deer
Suddenly changes its deer mind and
Decides to cross the road again
This time from right to left

I brake, honk, flash my lights
But the wicked deer continues
Galloping in a straight line
Until it hits the right front of my van

The deer is stunned and
I alight, apprehend the deer and
Ask for the deer’s accident insurance
The deer has none and pleads for its life

Deer, I said, you either fix my van or
You’ll be turned into venison
Because automobiles hit deer and
Deer are not supposed to hit automobiles

Yeah, it is time for deer to be insured
Any deer that hits an automobile and
Is uninsured is turned into instant venison
Errant deers are hereby warned, get your insurance.

ARE SOME ANIMALS MORE HUMAN THAN HUMANS — YES?