ASO ROCK RATS REGROUP TO RETAKE BUHARI’S OFFICE.
After 81 days of “Operation Snake Dance,” the three rats occupying the Presidential Office have been killed. It took the combined efforts of the Army, Air Force, Police, Civil Defense, Peace Corps, Customs, EFCC, Road Safety Corps, Fulani herdsmen, Boko Haram, and the Navy operating from Jabi Lake, three months to kill three rats.
Pythons could have been used but they were busy swallowing IPOB members in the South East. Pythons could have accomplished the task in three days. Chairing a meeting of the Hausa-Fulani Armed Forces Council (AFC), President Buhari thanked the members for their gallantry in dislodging the three rats. All officers involved in the battle were promoted to the next rank.
The first meeting of the AFC in three years discussed how to keep the oil flowing in the Niger Delta. The participants also set up a task force headed by Alhaji Lie Mohammed to handle the disappearance of Mazi Nnamdi Kanu, with misinformation.
In a counter move, the rats led by Hon Rattus Niger have vowed to return. They were seen amassing heavy military equipment stolen from the Army Armoury in Gwagwalada. Rattus Niger boasted that it will not be easy to dislodge them this time around. He quipped, “a hungry rat is an angry rat,” and bemoaned the state of the Nigerian economy.